I wish everyone here good luck in finding not a replacement, but a new adventures mate. I too am a widow for just 1yr and 7 months. My husband of almost 30 years passed away a week before Christmas The first year I was still in shock and now I am just so lonely.
I just joined this site today hoping to find some friends and possibly a special someone later on. I find this a little scarry but I know I have to take the plunge.
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I am neither, but have experienced being involved at two very different levels, firstly with my mother, when my father died when I was just 20, and she lived alone for 39 until she passed away as well, and it was hard for her in so much as my brother was married already and I worked away from home, and she had friends but basically gave up on life to some extent and became a recluse and only visited with close family on special occasions only.
The other was with my ex-wife who was married and had a bay with that person, but he died when Ben was only 5 months old, and we had worked together, and met up a months after his death when I was in the area to where she had moved, as people in her old town would cross the street rather than speak to her, not knowing what to say or do.
We subsequently started living together and then got married, but gradually I began to notice and realise things were not quite right, and we became slightly more distant before it came out, that she realised that she didn't really love me, and had married me for the wrong reasons. Eventually we agreed to split up and subsequently divorced, but have remained really good friends, not only for "our sons" sake, but for our own as well, as he knows me as his dad, and her ex, as his father.
So yes when the time is right, move on, make friends, go on dates, and if more develops then go for it, life is too short to have regrets, and although what happened at the time hurt a lot, I just wanted to see my ex happy even though I couldn't do that for her. I am sure your partner would also not want you to live life alone either.
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So my advice is move forward, file the past away in a special place, and open the phase of your life. On being widowed many years ago after 22yrs of marriage, l went through the normal shock and grief, following that, strange expectations that friends, neighbours, would rally round with a stream of invites to their home, meals, outings, whilst the local males would offer to do heavy garden maintenance work when seeing me struggling, neither happened much at all, some wives think of you as a threat, be it neither you or their husbands are interested, so we learn, and have a go at all manner of jobs, cistern, ubends, putting shelves up,be it theyre a bit fragile, limited weight load, hands and knee,s cursing the vac, then using a drill,jigsaw, hedge cutters, decorating shared before now done alone.
With all the practical problems, crisis, you do learn and manage, most of the time. The worst is loneliness, much of the time you get by ok with a friend, neighbourly chat, family get togethers, but sometimes, for me usually bank holidays, sundays, the times when as a couple you are most likely to set off, countryside, coast, dine out, its about missing sharing, a chat, laugh, problems, plans, filling the gaps.
One son lives a fair distance so see rarely, the other more regular for short chats, love the company of my 2 dogs and 2 cats, be lost without them, also my garden.
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Don't expect us to take down all the photographs or hide the urn. Though once you get to bedroom status, I think you're within your rights to ask that the wedding photo be turned away from the bed. You're not in competition with our memories. Understand that there will always be that layer of memories and love, and accept that part of us.
It shows that we know how to love. Recently, I've had a few dates with a couple of different widowers. I loved the conversation, how easily we slipped in and out of past and present tense, how we acknowledged the fear and the reluctance to date again -- and how we realized that our growth depends on learning how to do that. What do you think? Your comments are welcome, especially if you are widowed or are dating a widow or widower.
Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty. I imagine that four years could slip by quite easily in a blur of grief and the responsibilities of steering two boys through their teenage years in the shadow of that bereavement. Bringing up kids alone is no mean feat. It's easy for me to say, but you really do need to get out more.
I may be as outmoded as the corset, but to me online dating doesn't illustrate the most enthusiastic of approaches to engaging with the opposite sex. Cyberspace is not the best location for relearning the intricacies of dating. In most cases modern technology has set back the subtlety of human interchange a few hundred years. Express messaging like "cw2cu" hardly represents a high point of communication.
Not that "dating" should be your priority. How about some day-to-day interaction before you start getting all doe-eyed on the opposite sex?
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Surely there must be women at work, at the gym, on the train with whom a conversation, a social outing, a walk is not out of the question? Could you be saving yourself for Mrs Right before you've dallied with a few Ms Wrongs? It's highly unlikely you'll land a big fish before you've had nibbles from a few minnows. You need to downgrade your expectations and enter the fray with your wits about you.
Believe it or not, some women may just want to use you for sex! Check out the Oscar-nominated Up in the Air for research purposes.
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Judging by the ages of your boys, you've been out of the game for two decades. You'll find the landscape of love has changed a lot. Getting married again is a laudable ambition, but I wouldn't go dropping it into casual conversation to all and sundry. It suggests that your trauma has made you eager to replace the status quo, not that you are ready to move on and experience what else life has on offer. It's not a new wife you need right now, but friends of both sexes. It's important that you have companions to steer you through the trials and tribulations of dating.