Dating new jersey

That's brusque NJ humor.

Better get used to it. You won't find Southern levels of friendliness in northern NJ. In the suburbs, most friend-making revolves around the schools. If you don't have kids, it can be tough. I don't know what it's like in the more single-centric towns, like Hoboken, etc.

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I can recommend having a dog as a sure-fire conversation starter. I spent three months on a work assignment living in southern NJ Moorestown and found the general atmosphere to be much warmer and more laid-back. I really enjoyed it there. I am not used to this kind of humor.

A dating guide for singles looking to avoid the bar scene

Well, I am looking forward to test the water. No I don't have kids. I guess I will have to find a way to make friends. You didn't mention how old you are.

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If you are under 30 I would suggest hanging out at the bars in Hoboken. There are tons of single people there and people are very open to dating from what I've seen in my personal experience. If you're older or don't like the bar scene I would recommend Match or one of the other online dating sites.

I know several people that met their spouse and now mother of their children on those sites. If you're just looking to make friends at first you will hopefully meet people at work to go out with. That has always worked for me over the years. Like anywhere else, there are friendly people in NJ and not so friendly people. NJ is mainly a suburban state with a few ghettoes. Americas suburbs are deigned to be child raising factories.

There might be a few shore towns that are good for singles but I have no idea what they are. And they are probably dead outside of the beach season.

A dating guide for singles looking to avoid the bar scene

Originally Posted by nybbler. I love living here. I've been here almost 20 years. Online sites have settings that go by proximity, but don't take into account tunnels and tolls.

So I might get matched up with a great guy… who lives in the city. At first it seems great. I wait until my daughter has a slumber party or is staying with her dad…. Do I drive into the city and pay tolls and parking really hard on a budget… especially if the date wants to go dutch when their commute involved walking two blocks after work? Or do I take a train and have to explain to a potential suitor why I can't have another drink because if I miss this one that's running on an already limited-schedule, I am stuck sitting in Penn Station until 5 am….

Heaven forbid that potential nice guy I meet is from Brooklyn or Queens. They might as well live on a different planet.

I could almost get to Newark and fly to Chicago for less time and money than that date commute would cost. My mind starts thinking thoughts like, "well, I can see him, but not on a Sunday when I have to deal with MetLife Stadium traffic. And not on a Friday night, especially during the summer because everyone is trying to get to the shore.

And public transportation would require at the bare minimum a train or bus in NJ and at least one subway in New York and likely take over two hours, barring any rush hour traffic. So after trying to make a few of these relationships work, I've limited my dating pool mostly to guys that live in New Jersey.

Sounds like that would simplify things but it really doesn't help all that much. Someone who lives 20 miles away doesn't seem far on Tinder, but that's usually a 40 minute drive. If there's traffic, it can be a lot longer. If I live in North Jersey and they live in Princeton, that's a 45 mile drive and over an hour on a good day. I pretty much consider that a long-distance relationship.

It means that no matter if I drive or they drive, there's no such thing as "lets meet for a quick cup of coffee or a drink". It can turn into a power struggle filled with resentment of "I always have to drive to you" or "why do you have to live in the middle of nowhere", especially when you are both already dealing with the aforementioned scheduling nightmares.

I've actually stopped seeing decent men just because the idea of getting in the car and driving after I drive about 40 minutes each way to work already was far too overwhelming. Even when I date guys without kids the driving becomes and issue. Most often they don't really get that I've worked and driven all around for carpools and playdates all week, and spent until 2 am trying to re-piece together my daughter's broken doll house or make cupcakes for her girl scout troop party.