Christian dating friends first

You are not dating each other but you are so close to one another you are probably scaring off any other potential suitors.

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But eventually remaining friends will have diminishing returns and it would be better to move on together or take a step back from one another. If this person does not possess the qualities of godly spouse , no matter how great of friends you are with him or her, you should not enter into a Christian dating relationship with this person. Friendship and enjoying someone socially is really important if you want a healthy Christian marriage one day.

A personal connection is not enough to sustain two people for the ups and downs of real life that will occur over the decades of a Christian marriage. Sometimes the best options for dating and marriage are right under your nose. Sometimes people complain about there not being many good options for Christian dating. However, if you have a Christian friend of the opposite sex that you really enjoy, it might be worth praying about dating this person. Point 5 may cause some of you uneasiness because in point 2 we talked about how dating will certainly change your friendship in an irreversible way.

So it can seem like too big a risk to try and start dating a Christian guy or girl that you truly value as a friend.

Not only will your dating relationship change your friendship, it is also true that any dating relationship one of you gets involved with will change your friendship. And once one of you gets married, your friendship should change even more.

Guy and girl friendships are not built to last. Something is wrong if a husband or wife spends lots of time with friends of the opposite sex without their spouse present like they are still single. However, I am against close friendships for guys and girls who are in a relationship or are married to someone else. This can present unhealthy risks and temptations. Hanging out in group settings with friends of the opposite sex is healthy.

But if you are married and still close with a friend of the opposite sex and your spouse is not really involved in this friendship, I believe this is in not appropriate. My point is this: If you share your feelings for your friend and he or she does not feel the same way, things will probably be weird. But rest assured you two were not going to be great friends for too long anyways. One of you is probably going to start dating and get married soon and your friendship would be pretty much over at that point anyway. What have you experienced when it comes to building friendship through dating?

Please share your thoughts in the comments!

I discovered your blog through truelovedates. I enjoyed reading your guest post. Keep it up and God bless!

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Monica, thank you so much for your encouragement! Your email address will not be published. Currently you have JavaScript disabled. In order to post comments, please make sure JavaScript and Cookies are enabled, and reload the page.

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Click here for instructions on how to enable JavaScript in your browser. Well, they say you should give your writing a title that attracts attention! Next article Navigating The Friend Zone. You may also like. June 18, at 6: June 29, at 1: Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. But this mindset has too often led me to pick one girl I liked and to form an expected goal in my head before I even make the first move — before I really even get to know her as a person.

And, without real-life interaction and companionship, those expectations too easily lead to hurt and disappointment.

Christian Dating vs. Worldly Dating- Big Differences

The approach of getting to know someone without the pressure of a relationship — while it sounds good — has admittedly challenged my previous views on dating. I had one good friend suggest that, when I met a girl I found interesting, I ask her to meet me for coffee, but without paying for hers. We should just spend time with people, enjoy and value it for what it is, and then see when and if a more exclusive form of dating seems like the right next step.



One of the first new friends I made in this area was a girl close to my age. I just tried to get to know her more as a person, as a friend, because friends are what I still need more of in my new location anyway. I just enjoyed getting to know and talk to a friend, without feeling like I needed to impress her or act differently like I might on a serious date. If we can all begin to work toward that goal of cultivating sincere and valuable friendships, then hopefully all of our relationships — friendships and otherwise — will become a lot healthier and happier.