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A GOOD friend is someone who will help you move a dead body. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is. Every day, man is making bigger and better fool-proof things, and every day, nature is making bigger and better fools.
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So far, I think nature is winning. There are two kinds of friends: A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. The easiest job in the world has to be coroner.
Surgery on dead people. The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedies. Ever notice that people who spend money on beer, cigarettes, and lottery tickets are always complaining about being broke and not feeling well? I wanna hang a map of the world in my house.
The best thing about living at the beach is that you only have assholes on three sides of you.
Unique Dating Headlines That Actually Work
Why is it that in the US: If you take off all your clothes and walk down the street waving a machete and firing an Uzi, terrified citizens will phone the police and report: Canadians are more polite when they are being rude than Americans are when they are being friendly.
At every party there are two kinds of people: The trouble is, they are usually married to each other. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Then it dawned on me… they were cramming for their finals.
Catchy Dating Headlines That Attract Women Online
You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him. You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead. The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was. The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born, and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.
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We know that a lot of you who are reading this are creative in your own ways. Hit us with your best pick-up lines in the comments below.
Catchy Dating Headlines That Attract Women Online
Whether clever, funny, or downright serious, give us your best shot and try to swoon us with one line. Here are some of the best Tinder pick-up lines to try. Online Dating , Tinder.
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Your email address will not be published. There are women who would find that lines funny and flattering? I think these lines are pure stupid and not flattering at all. I would be offended if someone I barely know talked to me this way. Nice article, very useful and new information. I wrote an article on how to pickup girls on Tinder in just 4 steps: Nice article Joel, very useful and new information.
Tinder is a really powerful app to get dates, but I'm sure you're not getting out the most of it Not using the right pics, not adding an interesting bio description or bad conversation start can make that you're potential date lose all interest on you Take a look at: My name is Nick Steven and I am 24 years old young boy. Best Dating Profile Examples. Dating Profile Examples for Women.
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