Dating a standoffish girl

Share Share this post on Digg Del. Last edited by ExposedBrick; 27th March at 2: If they're on a repeat date with you, they're not stand-offish.


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I agree that you touched her and she her body language seemed tense. Maybe she is inexperienced or maybe she is being careful not to give you a message that she is okay with hooking up. You know online dating would make a woman defensive like that with most guys just wanting hookups. I would say rather than trying to touch her leg, you keep it conventional and gentlemanly, like confined to hands or forearms, a hand on her back if you're steering her to a seat.

Women understand the conventional polite touching. If you're touching leg, that may be alarming to someone on a first or second date or out in public. Try just holding her hand when you're walking to and from the car or something like that and see if you get the same reaction or not. She may warm up -- or she may just not be warm! Don't wait for flirting because a lot of women are too embarrassed to openly flirt. It sounds like you were trying to use some sort of dating "formula" we've all heard of this one Further, she appeared a bit closed from the beginning yet the place you decided to use this formula on was, of all places, her thigh This would be kind of like her accidentally brushing your azz with the back of her hand, or heck, up high on your jeans in the front, oops.

What would you make of that? So she got seriously closed off because she feared you think of her as just a pump Because we women can generally tell when the guy is "trying for something" in this way no matter how smooth the attempt may seem to the attempter. And what it translates to is: This guy seems to want to get to the sex part and is thinking he can get me there with these little tricks, with my hardly even noticing I'm falling for it.

Especially with a woman who isn't into sex very early on in the relationship. All women will vary in this, of course, and will vary depending upon the actual guy we're with and whether we do want him or whether we're not sure But her reserved nature from the beginning should have given you your clue. So she's still going out with you because she's wondering whether she is misreading what you're doing and she wants to find out if you do just want sex.

If you keep kino-ing her like mad, and particularly on the thigh, but at this point even on the shoulder because now you've sensitized her to the fact that you're grabby even when she's giving you CLEAR signals she does not want to be touched at the moment, she'll be gone, guaranteed. Because that will just confirm her suspicions.

She'll decide you were just looking for a pump Just get to know her without making sure you oops, whoops, accidentally brush near her V with the "back" of your hand Get to know the woman. Back off a little. Stop entirely disrespecting her physical boundaries remember See if she opens up a bit then, once she can trust you She won't open up yet because she's not sure whether you're just a wolf, so she is, quite literally and physically, protecting herself until she can confirm what it is you want.

OTOH, if you want to put in the work of showing her you aren't just out for a little, it may take a bit of time at this point. You're trying now to undo discomfort you've given her. So it's up to you whether you want to. If you do, please take my advice and back off and let her be comfortable. Let us know how it goes. They act like they have never had contact with a human being before.

Worst Things About Dating a Girl

Also keep in mind that they may not be able to read you, either. I remember having a long date with a woman who seemed to enjoy herself, but it wasn't reflected in her body language at all. Taking a bit of a gamble I kissed her on the cheek before we parted, and she grabbed my hands and jumped with joy, happily surprised that I seemed interested. She wasn't able to read me previously, and I wasn't aware of that. So yes, it can very well be that these women are unable to get a clear signal from you, or you are acting in a way that confuses them.

Last edited by CptInsano; 27th March at 3: Originally Posted by CptInsano. She wasn't able to read me previously. So yes, it can very well be that these women are unable to get a clear signal from you. Originally Posted by Larryville. Yup Stop overthinking and enjoy the company. Originally Posted by ExposedBrick. Hmm, I guess it's possible. I wanted to make sure I at least attempted to kiss her to make sure she new I was interested. She just had very cold body language the whole time I've seen her, which makes me think it's just habitual.

Making Logical Sense Of Dating And Relationships

Originally Posted by CaliforniaGirl. Last edited by ExposedBrick; 27th March at 3: A guy wants to be with a girl who is kind-hearted and gives off a warm and positive energy that is uplifting to be around. Dating someone high-maintenance can make a relationship much more time consuming and take up a lot more work than most guys are up for. This point is not necessarily a red flag but it is something a guy will take note of, potentially becoming an issue down the road.

This set-up is also going to be a disaster for a guy that is jealous in any way. It takes a VERY chill guy to be okay with this type of arrangement. You have to be fun! Just as a woman wants to be with a guy who is funny and interesting, guys are looking for the same. In fact, most guys would say that girls who just love to laugh are the best. They make the environment fun and happy, and also give him great opportunity to crack jokes and feel like the funny guy that he desperately wants to be.

This can apply to many areas — adventurous when it comes to travel, food and culture, life and activities, as well as in the bedroom. The idea of a relationship is to find a partner in crime, someone who you can break the rules for what life and love are supposed to look like, and live your life and relationship on your own terms.

15 Reasons Why The Aloof Girl Always Gets The Guy | TheTalko

Energy is extremely important. Most guys want a woman to be successful in her own right, and have her own things happening apart from him. Particularly if the guy is very ambitious, he wants to find a compatible counterpart who can keep up with him and and have someone to bounce ideas off of.

You figure this out quickly in the dating process, but a girl who is too into her cell phone is a serious turn off. Also, how into SnapChat she is and other social platforms platforms plays a role as well. And of course, how often she feels the need to text in front of you as well. Not only does a guy want a girl who is clean and smells nice, but a girl who also puts in effort to take good care of herself. No guy wants to be with a slob!

Girl Is Warm One Day, Slightly Standoffish The Next

A guy wants a girl who shaves her legs, brushes her hair, exercises and eats well, showers on a regular basis, wears deodorant and perfume and smells nice, and ultimately, a girl who takes pride in her appearance, and not just for her partner, but also for herself. One weird smell in those early stages of intimacy and you can turn someone away very quickly.

This is something that goes without saying, but a guy wants his girl to be hygienic and take care of herself in all aspects. Someone who is super proactive and takes control of their life is a big turn on. Laziness could be applied to many things — not ever working out or exercising is one aspect, but also someone who just never wants to get outside and do anything.

A guy wants to date someone who is motivated in life and has a ton of drive to make big things happen for herself. Those who are humble, hard working, and extremely down to earth and genuine are the best types of girls to be around. Entitlement — even if there is actual justification for her to potentially be a little entitled — is the most unattractive quality in a woman. Another major red flag is when a woman is hyper critical of you, or constantly tries to change you.

This type of behaviour takes place when she is constantly complaining about the things that drive her crazy about you, rather than choosing to focus on the things you do well. A guy wants to feel like he has the space and support within the relationship to act completely himself — and feel safe and secure — that he will be loved just for that. Too much makeup is one of those classic red flags. Too much makeup also bleeds into the high-maintenance thing and makes a girl come across as more high-maintenance, and less as someone who would be easy going and drama free.