At that point, the sex was very much over, and she immediately put her clothes back on and called a lyft as quickly as she could. Keep in mind that this happened within a week of us breaking up. Back to the situation, I am obviously mortified, but she was still very emotionless, and as soon as the sex was over, she tried to go back home as soon as possible. When she hopped in the lyft and went home, I texted her because I had so many bad feelings that just felt like a sink in my stomach.
My heart sank even deeper. It was at that point that I realized this person is a sociopath and gains pleasure from inflicting pain on me because she knows that she has power over me because of my emotional state. The only reason she was texting me after and maintaining contact with me was because she is really horny and I am an attractive guy who she likes to have sex with. It was rough but next time I have to watch the signs, because a person who treats everyone like shit will also eventually treat you like shit. I am sorry that you have been through so much.
Know that what has happened is no reflection on you. The only way to truly heal from this is to cut her off. In every single way. The longer that you remain in contact the more prolonged pain will be. Thank you for taking the time to read my experience. Your words are very kind and I appreciate the advice and support. It really helps and I feel better reading your reply. Life is full of lessons and harsh experiences and instead of dwelling on them they should be lessons for the future. I just went through a similar situation.. A man I believe was a sociopath and made me feel I was the only person on the planet that mattered.
Even went as far as to tell me he cared about me more than himself.. No real friendships to speak of either. This made me feel like I was the center of his universe. He as well had many past sexual experiences from which he told me about. I was accused constantly of messing around on him and I began fighting for my honor.
Then he would tell me what a bitch I was and how selfish. Sometimes the last face slap would leave a bruise and me crying. Somehow that would lead to me consoling him. Much like you I did many favors for him but he would insist he did so much for me. I believe when he thought he was unable to control me anymore he found his next victim.
Top 18 signs that you were dating sociopath!!
Of course I found out the hard way and he let me know how well she treats him to drive the knife in further. Just like you I lay awake often blaming myself and almost yearning for the relationship back, which is quite sick. I just want you to know you deserve so much better than her. Take it as a learning experience and find someone who loves you for the caring man you are.
Hopefully we can both recover from this horrific experience. Best of luck to you but please unload her for good. All of us on this site know your pain. Because you found this site like we all did. If you read about experiences others have had you will swear you were dating the same person. That is because these traits appear over and over again in this personality disorder.
The truth will set you free!
I am sorry you had to experience this — it will scar you a bit and for a while you may be hyper-vigilant to these traits. You may meet someone else and think uh-oh or see these traits in people you know. You like others here were taken by surprise. This person seduced you, made you feel special, made you jump through hoops, kept you off balance. Then, when they sucked you dry, they dropped you like hot iron and blamed you. You may feel broken right now, but trust me, they are the broken ones.
You will hopefully learn and move on.
12 Signs You're Dating a Psychopath (and What to Do About It)
They will repeat the same pattern over and over again with different people. Thank you for this post! My soon-to-be ex husband of 1. I want that guy! Stay strong everyone and get your inner voice back! My sociopath was someone I worked with for years. Someone who had mentored me. The weird thing was I remember being creeped out by him a little and not being the only one.
He was one that would put his hand on your arm when he talked to you and a few of us were uncomfortable with it. We were married and created distance with him. I was on a different shift than him. He not only was a coworker in the hospital where we work but a personal trainer as a side job and at one point did real estate appraisals as well. Training and encouraging other coworkers in the field.
I knew him for almost two decades like this. Eight years ago I had back surgery and subsequently got very into fitness. That is how he became a mentor and how we became close and also how I dismissed my original feelings about him.
1. Superficial charm
As I became stronger I would come to him for advice. He was always encouraging and said of course you can do this or accomplish that. He encouraged me to become a trainer and got me a job training clients. Even let me teach one of his group fitness classes. Eventually I enrolled at a gym that I later came to find out he frequented. In all those eight years and the years before he never made a pass at me nor had I the feeling of anything inappropriate other than that initial creepy feeling.
I would frequently be in the gym while he was lifting with his sons and he appeared to be a great dad, always with his kids and always very encouraging. Things changed when I decided to leave my husband and he found out.
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The day I told him I was leaving my husband and moving out he asked me to lunch. We talked about our relationships being unhappy and what we both wanted. It was like being seen for the first time. We wanted all the same things. He said he was going to move out and was looking to buy a house. I should note his wife also works in the hospital where we work but in another department and we have little contact with that department.
He talked about needing and eventually having benefits healthcare and PTO that his wife used to carry for him and the kids with other coworkers also.
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I moved out and we started seeing each other. He had already explained that when he and his wife had problems in the past it got ugly and uncomfortable in the hospital with lots of drama and people taking sides. He said he was in the process of moving out.