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Like an architect and over singles, a relationship intelligence. On a semi-related note Natalie, I would love to see more posts on the looks vs. I read your series from earlier and it was excellent! My question is, what do you do when you are making a conscious effort not to trade on these things, but that seems to be the only thing that the men you meet seem to notice, even after going out with you a couple of times?
Bulls-eye, guilty as charged. I should have the heading of this essay branded on my brow. He has no idea I ever liked him. That IS what it feels like; yet you are correct.
How do we escape this addiction? You read that right: What on earth would we talk about? I have a terrible addiction to intelligent men who direct feature films and are older than I am because I am an intelligent woman who directs feature films. These kinds of men turn right around, walk past me, and pick girls with the brains of a beach ball.
When I was not lucky, a decade plus ago, they got into bad relationships with me and destroyed my heart. All I want is to be half of a power couple. What is so wrong with that? Is it so impossible? It sure seems to be. HF, this comment is a fantastic contribution to a tenuous yet fascinating subject. I need to digest but what I will say is this: There is only a small pool of directors which when you throw in power and success gets down to an even smaller pool. She relies very much on her husband to support her, I guess like a traditional wife would a husband.
He may be a house husband. She sees his role in their marriage as being just as important as hers. I know a female lawyer, very successful, whose husband is a teacher and does a lot of the childcare. Would that not work for you?
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Looking for someone who is a male version of you could lead to an imbalance. And, as nat says, the number of successful feature film directors who are single must be very very small! There are plenty of decent intelligent people about. Maybe we need to look at this from a different angle. I trip over intelligent people sometimes literally all the time. I work in the City. Validation, again, that old chestnut. I can quite see myself being single for the rest of my life.
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Interesting, I wonder how this is all going to pan out! Not so much the other way round. I have a similar hang-up, HF. In fact, as much as I feel reluctant to point the finger at my age!
That has been her one piece of advice. I have had two relationships with men who were intelligent, curious, and good. I know that my attraction to the AC who, incidentally, often used to remind me of how he was a PBR-listener! In hindsight, I can see that, initially, my intellectual status as a PhD etc. He said as much when he binned me. As women become better educated, it is tricky though. Anyway, I am still working this out too hence the assortment of ideas here!
I want to be with a man who is interesting and interested in life.